What does it mean to trust?

What does it mean to trust?

I was asked recently how to release all one’s fears to God and to rest. In truth. I was in a dark space and the typical pat answers we usually give people did not feel like enough. I said, “I don’t really know. I’m still figuring it out.” For me. If I go out for a hike or a long walk and put on my power praise music I find the Holy Spirit’s presence drives out the dark. But as soon as I go back inside and turn the music off the clouds come again.
Recently I had a terrible case of covid. This new strain is no joke. I truly felt I would die about four times before the sun started peaking through and I began to recover. My case has been so bad that for a week I physically did not have the strength to move around much. I was too dizzy to do anything for myself and I spent two weeks on the couch watching Christmas movies and sleeping. Never have I been sick like this. Next week I have my first math exam for my college courses. It has been a terrifying challenge for me and the reason I fell into such a slump of depression. Over Christmas we were supposed to study for our exam. I couldn’t. I tried to. Really hard. But I was too sick. I couldn’t figure it out. Why would God let me get sick? Yet during this time of forced rest I learned the answer to the question I had been asked earlier. To truly let go and rest in God’s peace, you have to actually let go. Release it all. Stop striving and let it slip into God’s hands. A devotional I read once said, to rest is to trust God. We feel rest is lazy. We feel we should be doing something. But rest is letting God take over, trusting that God will take care of it all even when we do nothing. Does that mean I am not studying hard these days to make up for the time missed? No. But I am not trusting in myself for the success. I am trusting that God will help me succeed with His power. I am doing what I am doing because I trust His will. It is in His hands.
To trust is to rest in God’s peace and strength. He does not need our fear and striving. He wants our trust.