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Monsters like me

How would you classify a monster?
A wild haired human-like creature, with glowing eyes staring at you from behind rusted steel bars.
A four legged animal (ish) thing with long fangs and a thick chain holding it to the ground as it snarls.
How about a great dragon puffing out smoke and screaming out fire from the contains of it’s cave?
Or would you say me? I am the monster. No one understands the pain holding me behind these rusted bars, the glow in my eyes are simply tears. I snarl out of fear as my guilt holds me to the ground, and my shame keeps me bound. The puffs of smoke are to hide behind, the scream of fire simply a scream of need. No one gets me. Everyone feels this way at one time or another. No one gets me. It is true. No person can possibly get you, the true you, the real you. You think if you are exposed as the true person you are, those around you will see the monster and run. But Jesus has seen that monster. As you lean back and cower in the dark, dank corner of your cage fearing the light; Jesus comes and reaches out a hand to touch you. The brilliance of His presence is almost agonizing, as you hear all the people who have ever brought you down speak into your mind once again; because the pain they have left is no longer hidden in the dark as Jesus draws it to the light. The steel chains burn as Jesus reaches forward and points to your hand. You look down at your clenched fist and slowly hand your fist to Jesus. He gently unfolds your fingers and takes the keys to your chains and cage out of your hand. He unlocks you and carries you out into the sun and suddenly you realize, you are not the monster that you saw, and you see that you are the one who locked yourself in that cage. Your emotions allowed everything anyone ever said about you to make you feel unlovable, so much so that you locked yourself away. Allow Jesus to take the keys and set you free. Permit His love to burn away the fear and pain. He is not judging you, He loves you. Trust Him. You are not a monster. You ARE a child of God.

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Blog · Christianity · Devotional · dreams do come true · encouragement · Jesus

No matter the squalls

When chasing a dream it is too easy to think the whole thing will be Cinderella. You are working hard under a horrible task master but you keep dreaming, and then one day all your wishes upon stars come true and it’s life in the palace from here on out. That’s a nice story but not a reality. Real dreams don’t just come up to you, take you by the hand and off you go together; you have to work for them. Take heart because the harder you work for a dream the sweeter it is when the dream comes to pass. However, while working I know it is all too easy to hit the ‘I hope this is worth it’ button. Because the minuet you start doubting your goal and start wondering if it’s realistic you easily start feeling like you are putting too much into it. You may even wonder if this is God’s will at all.
I once heard an evangelist say…’if God is putting something on your heart, something you long for and can’t let go of, be prepared, because He is setting you up for it to happen.’
Pray about your doubts because your longing dream may very well be God preparing you for what He has planned for your life. And don’t let go of the helm no matter the squalls that arise, because the light coming off you once you succeed will be the light of Heaven as God cheers you on.

Blog · Christianity · Devotional · encouragement · Jesus · searching

Chaos

Out of the chaos come the best stories.
Think about the greats. Tolkien, Lewis, Dickens, Vern, Stevenson, so on. The main theme of most of their stories is chaos. War, poverty, destruction, and the aftermath of all of the above. And out of these horrors come stories that touch people’s hearts. Stories that soon become legends in their own right; stories that guide you down a path laden with dark, crumbling caverns and forests only to emerge at the entrance to magnificent palaces and lands filled with magic and faeries.
Most stories have at least a moment of chaos that leads the protagonist to the right place at the right time so they can be there when the world needs them, or at least when the author needs them.
If we allow God to lead us through the chaos times in our lives we will find ourselves in the right place, at the right time when the author of the world needs us. And we will find after all the struggles that the grand palace and the land of magic was worth every dark, crumbling cavern we had to climb through; because God knows the end of the last chapter and He is guiding us on the best path to reach the apex of our lives where we will stand undefeated and look behind us to see the gentle, powerful hand that was leading us all along.

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Blog · Christianity · Devotional · encouragement · free · Jesus · searching

Still a slave

They say we are all prisoners of this world, but when we become Christians we are not; only through Christ are we free from this world so why do we refuse our freedom.

We are like slaves who get so used to their masters that they can’t leave them. This world abuses us, neglects us, starves us, beats us and yet we are so used to it that we refuse to be free from it.
Jesus is right there saying ‘follow me and I will show you how to be free.’ And yet we are sitting back, clinging to this familiar world, refusing to budge because freedom scares us. As soldiers say, true freedom you have to work for and fight for. We are constantly having to fight against the slave master of this world because he knows we are afraid and he knows it’s easy to seduce us into a sense of complacency where we fall into his clutches. But Jesus is stronger than the evil and He is fighting on our side.
No matter how long it takes no matter how hard we fight against Him Jesus will always be there with a nail scarred hand stretched out toward us, pulling us out of our prison and showing us the way of the free.
‘My chains are gone, I’ve been set free. My God, my savior has ransomed me and like a flood his mercy rains. Unending love, amazing grace.’-Casting Crowns

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How often do we feel we are going the wrong way when we are really going the only way?

How often do we feel we are going the wrong way when we are really going the only way?

I wonder how often we are truly following God and His plan and the devil comes up behind us and covers our eyes making us think we are going the wrong way. How often do we stop and change course because the devil has blinded us to the path?
God is fighting for us. That doesn’t just mean in our stead He is also fighting to keep us. As God is directing our paths we constantly have the devil telling us we are going the wrong way; that we aren’t following God but are following ourselves, even though we know that is not true.
Sometimes when God is quiet the devil gets very very loud and that can confuse us. But if we focus on God and pray, even if we don’t hear God He can send us a feeling to His direction. Sometimes in the heart racking sobs the unbelievable peace that hits you is God answering you. Sometimes in the wistful joy it’s the pang of uncertainty that is God saying, “be careful.” I have no answer to the question of, “what do I do God?” Because I am not you and only you can know what God is saying to you. It’s that still small voice; that impossible whisper that guides us. It can be so hard to hear, but don’t lose heart because Jesus knows what He is doing with you and He will show you the next safe place to put your foot.

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Blog · Christianity · Devotional · encouragement · Jesus · searching

What does Jesus say when He prays

What does Jesus say when He prays?
The Bible says Jesus prays for us
and most people I have heard talk about this say that He is praying for our souls. That is probably very true. This week I hit the sea floor and the waves keept shoving me back to the bottom everytime I tried to resurface. In the midst of the drowning I was walking past a painting we have in our house of Jesus praying and it hit me, is He praying for my situation? I suddenly realized that Jesus most likely does not just pray for my soul He probably prays for me. For my problems, for my fears, for my hurts, my needs, my crushing blow days. Jesus probably prays for all of it. So on those nights when it’s 12 am and I still can’t find the words to pray its alright, because Jesus says everything in His prayers that needs to be said. I simply need to support Him with worship.
Jesus. Wow! Thank you for praying for me, for caring that much.

Christianity · Devotional · encouragement · Jesus · searching

Trust fall

Do you remember how in school every so often the teacher would insist upon doing trust exercises? You’d pair up and then take turns falling and catching each other. Usually you would choose to pair up with a friend right? You wanted to make sure that the person who was catching you was someone you could trust. When we pair up with Jesus we are falling blindly into His arms and trusting that He will catch us.
I can tell you that thinking back on those exercises I don’t remember the people I caught but I definitely remember the people I let fall, (by accident). How often do we feel like God has let us fall and then we focus on those times alone? Just a heads up God never lets you hit the ground. He always has a plan for you no matter how abandoned you may feel at times. Think on how many times God has caught you instantly when you trust fell into Him; those times will out number the amount of times He has let you dangle. Also try and look at the circumstances. It may be annoying to hear but try to see the good that can come out of God not catching you right away this time. I won’t do the eagle and nest quote but sometimes in our flailing we are able to find a stronger hold on Jesus. Even if you can’t see Him standing behind you, your friend Emmanuel is ready to catch you, you never fall past where God wants you because that’s where He will catch you.

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Christianity · Devotional · Jesus · searching

Star with royal beauty

Driving home from work a large green ball of fire with a beautiful white tail sped across the sky off to my left. I was sure it was a comet of some kind. The driver in front of me veered off to follow the path of the amazing light probably hoping to see more of it. It was not until the weekend that I found out that it was the famous Christmas Comet. Seeing that comet made me think. The most famous star ever, made it’s debut around this time of the year, and like the driver ahead of me there were people who dropped everything to follow it.

I can picture myself as one of the wise men. I’ll be Beltashazar. Sitting in my study surrounded by parchment and literally burning the midnight candle. Suddenly a bright light takes over the sky. The next thing I know I’m in the middle of the desert on a camel with two other guys and we are all following this star. We dropped everything to go and admittedly my mind keeps wandering back to, “did I blow out all my candles before I left?” Not that it would matter seeing as we have been following said star for nearly 2 years. But giving up isn’t even in our minds because we know the king of glory is waiting for us. Hot, sweaty; shoes torn, camels exhausted we three ‘kings’ tumble into the house where Mary, Joseph and king baby Jesus are living. Suddenly all the dirt is washed away, my sore, aching bones feel strong and healed and my heart is filled with the awe of seeing my king.

We get the privleage to know the light of the world even while here on earth. When we become Christians we choose to drop our old lives and begin to follow Him. We follow long and through many obstacles trying to get a better look at our wonderful saviour; and when the journey is through and we find ourselves where the star is residing we get to go into His home and see Him face to face. Suddenly all the wear of the world and the weariness of life falls off and we get to embrace Him. Our savior, our Jesus.

Christianity · Devotional · encouragement · free · Jesus · searching

Open handed combat

When I was in high school I took basic karate. One of the main things drilled into the class was the fact that karate means open handed combat, which means that our combat is self defense it is not meant as a form of attack. If we apply this technique to life we get a person entering their day open minded to the people around them and empty handed of judgments. When we go out into this world we are stepping onto the mat and as Christians the way we respond to daily jabs and kicks need to be censored according to our teachings. In martial arts your fight technique reflects that of your teacher, in the same way our daily response to life needs to reflect Jesus. We enter the arena holding nothing against the people we will face, we come in open minded to their situation. Picture this. Bright blinding lights, a roaring crowd and a tall battle scarred warrior faces you down as your toe touches the mat, there’s no turning back now. You see that angry face, the deep creases of old battles lost and you gain your opinion of the warrior. They step closer and you step up to them, you don’t yet know what will happen next all you know is this person has been hurt too many times and it is your turn now to decide, do you attack or do you help? Do you reign judgement and add to their scars or do you give compassion and help the scars heal? Your mind open and clear so you can hear from the Holy Spirit and see this person’s needs and you realize all they need is a comforting hand. As the vision fades away; the crowds and the lights dim, you see the warrior in a new way, the way Jesus sees them. We shouldn’t enter the arena to fight we should enter to help; but sometimes in this daily life we Christians forget that we are not here to judge and attack the people around us, we are here to help them and in doing so show them Jesus. That’s the point to open handed combat, coming without prejudices and without judgements so you can help heal this world just as Jesus came without a sword or armor as a gentle baby in a manger.

dreams do come true · encouragement · Jesus · searching

Rebel Child

I rebel against all fear within me
I rebel against all shame
I rebel against all past hurts
I rebel against the pain
I stand in defiance of the fear
I stand and lock my knees
I am immovable you hear
Hear what I have to say
Jesus is my king and friend and He is power beyond compare
So little imperfections in me how dare you show yourselves here
My savior cares not who I was and He guides me to who I can be
Whenever I stumble I never truly fall because my Jesus is in me

We all have little voices inside our heads that bite at us throughout our lives. Those little voices lie and taunt and yet for some reason we always seem to believe them. STOP believing those voices and begin to believe the voice of Heaven; begin to believe what Jesus says about you. You are worthy, you are loved, and most importantly you are worth dying for. Jesus never lies and His truth chases off those biting little voices inside our heads because there is nothing about us that can change the way Jesus feels about us. There is nothing about us that is unlovable because Jesus will always love us and we are beautiful because we are works of art from the master’s hand, and guess what we are pretty amazing because God made us to be amazing no matter what pur little voices say.