Monsters like me

May 19, 2019 carriedinthecross2 Comments

How would you classify a monster?
A wild haired human-like creature, with glowing eyes staring at you from behind rusted steel bars.
A four legged animal (ish) thing with long fangs and a thick chain holding it to the ground as it snarls.
How about a great dragon puffing out smoke and screaming out fire from the contains of it’s cave?
Or would you say me? I am the monster. No one understands the pain holding me behind these rusted bars, the glow in my eyes are simply tears. I snarl out of fear as my guilt holds me to the ground, and my shame keeps me bound. The puffs of smoke are to hide behind, the scream of fire simply a scream of need. No one gets me. Everyone feels this way at one time or another. No one gets me. It is true. No person can possibly get you, the true you, the real you. You think if you are exposed as the true person you are, those around you will see the monster and run. But Jesus has seen that monster. As you lean back and cower in the dark, dank corner of your cage fearing the light; Jesus comes and reaches out a hand to touch you. The brilliance of His presence is almost agonizing, as you hear all the people who have ever brought you down speak into your mind once again; because the pain they have left is no longer hidden in the dark as Jesus draws it to the light. The steel chains burn as Jesus reaches forward and points to your hand. You look down at your clenched fist and slowly hand your fist to Jesus. He gently unfolds your fingers and takes the keys to your chains and cage out of your hand. He unlocks you and carries you out into the sun and suddenly you realize, you are not the monster that you saw, and you see that you are the one who locked yourself in that cage. Your emotions allowed everything anyone ever said about you to make you feel unlovable, so much so that you locked yourself away. Allow Jesus to take the keys and set you free. Permit His love to burn away the fear and pain. He is not judging you, He loves you. Trust Him. You are not a monster. You ARE a child of God.

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Blog · Christianity · Devotional · encouragement · Jesus

Washing the feet of the traitor

May 5, 2019 carriedinthecross3 Comments

Jesus washed the disciples feet. That means He also washed Judas’ feet.
How often do we feel like not only does one of our friends have a Judas complex, but also like we have been handed a bucket of hot water and a towel so we can wash their feet?
Friends can be fickle, and it is easy to feel betrayed and hurt by them, or to feel that they are just out for themselves, sound familiar? Sounds like Judas to me. We can never experience the pain of complete betrayal like Jesus ( even if it feels like we have) but dishonest, self seeking “friends” are everywhere and most people have gone through some form of frenimies pain; but Jesus still calls us to be there for them, to show them friendship and once in a while to wash their feet. Our God loves humility and what could be more humble of a task than foot washing? Can you smell the sweat ridden sandals? Can you feel the dirt of the road washing off of them and onto you? Perhaps That was Jesus’ point. He was about to wash us clean of all our sins and put them upon His own body, the same way He washed His friend’s feet and let their dirt wash onto His hands. Hands soon to be pierced by nails and hung on a tree. If Jesus could wash Judas’ feet I can wash the feet of my frenimies.

Jesus, please help us to wash the feet of those who hurt us. If for no other reason let us do it to draw closer to you. Amen

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Blog · Christianity · Devotional · encouragement · free · Jesus

Filled with nothing but hope and love

April 22, 2019April 22, 2019 carriedinthecross1 Comment

We dont usually see empty as a good thing, but when the tomb became just an empty hole it was the most joyous day in all of Heaven and earth. When we think empty we usually think void, lacking.
The grave was void, it was void of death. It was lacking, lacking the power to hold Christ and keep Him from rising. It was empty, empty of the sorrow that death brings. It was also full. That big space of nothing was filled to the brim with hope, love, new life and the glittering remnants of the glory of God.They say that love begins at 0. Does that 0 not look like a big empty hole to you? It does to me. Love began before the cross, on the cross and in the empty tomb. Love began in a manger in a little town called Bethlehem. Love is 0, love is a big, wondrous, EMPTY tomb. Because Jesus is no longer on the cross, no longer in the grave, today He rose, soon He is coming back again.
Happy Easter

Blog · Christianity · Devotional · encouragement · Jesus

Palms laid before Him

April 14, 2019 carriedinthecross2 Comments

Enter Jerusalem, the city streets are filled with celebrating and cheering as a humble and gentle donkey colt strides down the streets.
Palms are laid at the sweet animal’s feet and a sense of pride wells in the donkey’s heart. He is carrying Jesus, as all animals know Jesus is the king of kings, God’s one and only Son; but the donkey senses sonething, a feeling of pain in the heart of his Lord. The donkey is confused and turns his head to nuzzle the King’s foot, a gentle hand strokes the animal’s neck in response. The donkey stretches hard to see Jesus’ face. The beaming smile is a shock to the donkey because it can sense the sadness within the savior’s heart. All the gentle colt can do is continue to carry his Lord.
The animal saw both joy and sorrow and could not understand, but the joy was love for the King’s people, and the sorrow was knowledge that these people were only a breath away from condemning their King to die; but one small donkey showed his love and carried the weight of the savior as the savior carried the weight of the world.

Jesus was recorded as having great anguish as He neared Jerusalem. Anguish that simple human senses could barely begin to understand. To suffer is one thing, but to know you are about to suffer is another. If we saw the suffering that would come in our lives we as people could not handle it. Jesus knew every bit of His suffering to come and that caused Him greater pain than He would have experienced if it had all been a shock or surprise. Days of waiting are too much to bear, but He bore them for us. The false love of the people must have stung and the lies of Judas must have made His heart sick, but He suffered them all because He loves us. Oh what a love that is, who else could give such love? Who else would? Only Jesus loves us so much.

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Blog · Christianity · Devotional · Jesus · searching

I’ve got the blood of an innocent man all over me-Petra

April 7, 2019 carriedinthecross2 Comments

When a dramatic, violent death occurs in Anime there is often a painful scene where blood splashes across the protagonists face; it is almost if not absolutely symbolic of the horror, the suffering that is happening. The blood could go anywhere but it hits the face. Why? Because your face is your identity, and now the identity is marred with death.
We seem to avoid the blood of the cross. Oh we sing about it and we read the passage about it, but we like to skip ahead and get to the resurrection. The bright, clean, pure resurrection. We act as if that is the most important part of the story. I can’t help but wonder if it is the crown of thorns, the lashing, the pain, sorrow, blood and tears that are the most important parts.
We drink the blood at communion but that sweet juice does not reflect the warm, thick, salty tang of real blood. If you feel sick I don’t blame you, that is how you would feel if you drank blood.
The cross was not pretty, not clean, not all put together. It was messy, dirty, smelly and horror to the first degree.
Many were crucified but only one was whipped until nearly dead, forced to carry a cross, nailed to that cross and filled with the disgust of the worlds sins.
Even though three days later He rose, we must never forget the crown of thorns which He chose to wear and the wooden throne which read ‘king of the Jews’.

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Blog · Christianity · Devotional · Jesus

Music transcends language

April 1, 2019 carriedinthecross2 Comments

One of my favorite songs is completely in Japanese. Eventually I saw the subtitles and could relate also to the words, but even without the words, the music touched my heart. I cannot help but wonder if that is why worship is so important. Music touches us, moves us, changes us. I have heard of missionaries going to non English speaking countries, having church and having people break down in worship to words that they don’t understand because they understand the passion of the Spirit. The Holy Spirit moves in music, I have seen it and felt it and it is amazing! When the Holy Spirit moves your worship then you are truly touching Heaven.

Blog · Christianity · Devotional · dreams do come true · encouragement · Jesus

No matter the squalls

March 25, 2019 carriedinthecross1 Comment

When chasing a dream it is too easy to think the whole thing will be Cinderella. You are working hard under a horrible task master but you keep dreaming, and then one day all your wishes upon stars come true and it’s life in the palace from here on out. That’s a nice story but not a reality. Real dreams don’t just come up to you, take you by the hand and off you go together; you have to work for them. Take heart because the harder you work for a dream the sweeter it is when the dream comes to pass. However, while working I know it is all too easy to hit the ‘I hope this is worth it’ button. Because the minuet you start doubting your goal and start wondering if it’s realistic you easily start feeling like you are putting too much into it. You may even wonder if this is God’s will at all.
I once heard an evangelist say…’if God is putting something on your heart, something you long for and can’t let go of, be prepared, because He is setting you up for it to happen.’
Pray about your doubts because your longing dream may very well be God preparing you for what He has planned for your life. And don’t let go of the helm no matter the squalls that arise, because the light coming off you once you succeed will be the light of Heaven as God cheers you on.

Blog · Christianity · Devotional · encouragement · Jesus · searching

Enough light?

March 10, 2019 carriedinthecross3 Comments

Stormie Omartan wrote a book titled ‘just enough light for the step I’m on.’
The book itself I have not yet read, but the title has clung in my mind.
How often do we go through times like that? Days when we feel like we only have the dull beam of a dying flashlight guiding us, just enough light to see directly in front of us and that is it. We may even feel like that has been our whole lives, just enough, never more, never less. The point of the very dark and invisible path ahead is Faith. Would we need an all knowing God if we were all knowing ourselves? God could have given us a complete outline of what our lives would be but He knew that if we knew all we would go through we couldn’t handle it. Our free will also comes into play here. If God had given us an exact road map the decisions we made ( good or bad) would not have happened because they were not part of our map.
We have only enough light so we step out trusting in God, and even when we fall He catches us and lets us learn from our mistakes.
We would not be people, with thought and choice, if we had an exact path. Yes God has a path for all of us and a destiny and an end result, but a lot of what gets us where we are going is our decisions. It may be a hard road or an easy road depending on our choices. Sometimes we may even not end up where God plans for us to be because our decisions lead us elsewhere, but He allows us to be real and to make our choices without dictation. Jesus directs us. Not controls us, directs. He lets us choose where we will go but He still guides us to keep us safe.
We have just enough light to see the path and to somewhat make out where each path may go when we reach a crossroads.
Walking a dim path with Jesus is the same as if we were walking in brilliant, full sunshine.
Walking a dim path without Jesus is simply a good way to get lost.

Blog · Christianity · Devotional · encouragement · free · Jesus · searching

Still a slave

March 5, 2019 carriedinthecross4 Comments

They say we are all prisoners of this world, but when we become Christians we are not; only through Christ are we free from this world so why do we refuse our freedom.

We are like slaves who get so used to their masters that they can’t leave them. This world abuses us, neglects us, starves us, beats us and yet we are so used to it that we refuse to be free from it.
Jesus is right there saying ‘follow me and I will show you how to be free.’ And yet we are sitting back, clinging to this familiar world, refusing to budge because freedom scares us. As soldiers say, true freedom you have to work for and fight for. We are constantly having to fight against the slave master of this world because he knows we are afraid and he knows it’s easy to seduce us into a sense of complacency where we fall into his clutches. But Jesus is stronger than the evil and He is fighting on our side.
No matter how long it takes no matter how hard we fight against Him Jesus will always be there with a nail scarred hand stretched out toward us, pulling us out of our prison and showing us the way of the free.
‘My chains are gone, I’ve been set free. My God, my savior has ransomed me and like a flood his mercy rains. Unending love, amazing grace.’-Casting Crowns

Blog · Christianity · Devotional · encouragement · Jesus · searching

Do you love me?

February 26, 2019 carriedinthecross3 Comments

How many people here love the play fiddler on the roof?
Okay. How many of you remember the song ‘do you love me’?
Tevye asks his wife if she loves him and she responds-
Golde: Do I love you? For twenty-five years, I’ve washed your clothes, Cooked your meals, cleaned your house, Given you children, milked the cow.
Tevye: But do you love me?

How often do we work for God, suffer for God, take great strains to please God but don’t actually love Him? When we think about it if God set us on a perverbial mountain top with everything we ever begged for, searched for and longed for and then He just left, would we miss Him? Would we miss our times talking with Him? Worshiping Him? Being His friend?
Jesus wants a relationship, not a dictatorship. We can’t sit on our throne and tell our king what we want from Him, then complain when He isn’t fast enough or doesn’t do exactly what we wanted and not exspect Him to begin to feel unloved. We need to give the throne back to Jesus and sit at His feet just loving His presence.
So, do we love Jesus or do we love what He offers? Heaven, blessings, so on. If He left today would you miss Him? Would we notice He was gone?
In a time when we need to be remembering love remember to love the one who loves you more than anyone else ever can.

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